Friday, March 17, 2017

Androgyny, A Feverish Dream or Beautiful Reality?

"Androgyny" 2002 - Adrian L Acosta (pencil on paper 18x24)

My week started with another painful yet productive electrolysis session followed by a slow bodily decline into a burning fever.  The flu-like symptoms attacked full force.  I spent half the week laying down, sleeping, or in a fetal position with every inch of my body aching.  
I'm better now.  

The interesting thing about breaking a fever is how life seems anew.  Like Dorothy coming home from Oz, was it all a dream?

When you are confined to a bed for days while your body fights microscopic creatures seems the mind decides to take a stroll through Random-Town.  Out of nowhere I ask myself "Is my old art portfolio still tucked away in the closet?"  Shortly after gaining some strength I simply had to quench my curiosity. 

I put on my ballet flats and gradually made it to the closet .  Out comes the dusty portfolio.  I open it.  I see a piece I drew 15 years ago!  I literally let out an audible gasp.  

I'm not one to explain what my drawings "mean" but I will break down the imagery of the above piece Androgyny.

At the center of the piece is a levitating long haired faceless humanoid figure.  They have a breast on one side and a pectoral muscle on the other side of the chest as well as ambiguous genitalia.  The body language suggests pleasure but the tension of the arm and hand reaching out could be due to  pain.  The figure seems to be in/coming through/or coming out of a translucent box that defies the laws of space.  The same side where the hand is coming through a hole in the box is also the side that doesn't exist since the foot wearing the heel is coming out of the box.  So, does that side of the box exist or doesn't it?  

The other leg is coming through a hole at the bottom of the box.  This foot is bare but has what seems to be a black condom oozing from it all the way to the ground.  Follow the direction of the condom's tip and you arrive at what appears to be a stone sculpture of a male's lower back and buttocks.

The legs show a few cracks.  A steel sword is deep in the stone torso as if acting as a spine.  The torso is facing a small house in the distance.

There is a peculiar yet familiar shape to the house with it's pointy roof and welcome mat that spells "Cum Again."

You pull out a bit and you notice the house is casting a shadow.  Follow the shadow through the barren landscape and it leads you to a dead tree near the horizon.  

A sign hangs from the tree that reads "Libre" (Spanish for "Free").  The shadow that the tree casts is that of a person that's been hanged.  

As you pull back you again see the rock formation to the left of the drawing and the dark smokey clouds to the right.  If you squint your eyes you see that the negative space between them are child bearing hips.  The floating sphere in the sky has now become a naval, and the faceless figure's hair has become the pubic region of the hips.

This could very well be THE LAST, piece I ever did where I signed it using my legal name Adrian Lopez.  In 2003 I would start using my mother's last name Acosta.  

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Why Fire Island Must Exist

Invasion of the Pines 2009 photo: Adrian Acosta

I'm sipping my coffee as I scroll through my Facebook feed.  Suddenly I learn from the Huffington Post's Noah Michelson, (who wrote this piece about us), that the queens are coming to Reality TV! No, not the queens seen above,  I'm talking about the following queens.

I continue scrolling through my Facebook feed to find out that the very sexy Micheal Hartz, (who likes to stick sweet things in his mouth), worked on the production of the show.  

I know what you're probably thinking, who cares about these queens?  You're probably thinking that because an estimated 90% of my readers are not attracted to Gay Men, and especially not attracted to men who have the body types of the cast of the Logo show Fire Island.  I learned this through the comments on my video Straight Men who Love Femininity.  

That being said, you need to learn why Fire Island is such an important place which exists during the current political climate. 

Let me share with you how Fire Island has touched me.

I was introduced to Fire Island in 2009 by the talented Deryck Todd.

Deryck Todd photo: Adrian Acosta.  To enlarge click HERE

That year Deryck and I participated in the tradition known as the Invasion of the Pines.

As a first-timer at this flamboyant and colorful event I decided to document it through my photography.

Taylor Mac photo: Adrian Acosta

While on one of the ferries, that was filled with fairies, I snapped the photo of the amazing talent that is artist Taylor Mac.  The photo ended up being picked out of more than 800 submissions in the Next Magazine photo contest in 2010.  A 30x24 inch print was displayed at the Leslie/Lohman Gay Art Foundation in Soho New York City on June 22nd, 2010.  The event was covered by the hilarious Mike Diamond for And the photos I took that day ended up making a wonderful Coffee Table Photo Book.

Bianca Del Rio photo: Adrian Acosta               Miss Dirty Martini photo: Adrian Acosta

Justin Vivian Bond  photo: Adrian Acosta

Fire Island and especially the Invasion of the Pines is magical.  A place that welcomes all gender identities, sexual orientations, races, ages, etc.  It's a place where you can escape and be whoever you want to me.  It's like an LGBTQ Summer Camp for adults.   

While on the ferry  getting ready to disembark photo: Adrian Acosta

As you may know, prior to self-identifying as gender fluid and pansexual, I pretty much lived the life of a gay man.

Grindr Lesson #1

I would present as male in my Grindr profile.  And although I learned some pretty interesting lessons during that time, it never felt quite right for me.

Currently I present in femme on Grindr.  

And I have not been intimate with a self-identifying Gay man since 2015.  Since then, I've only been intimate with self-identifying straight men while I've been in femme. 

So naturally when I accepted an offer from my dear friend Brian back in 2015 to spend the weekend in Fire Island in a house filled with a bunch of gay men I was a bit hesitant.  If you watch the trailer for Logo's new Fire Island show you might understand why.  You might also understand what I mean if you read the piece I wrote back in 2013 "Some Gays Are Ignorant, and that's Ok."

You might not know this but I'm a bit of an introvert and shy when I'm in a new environment with folks I meet for the first time.  I keep to myself and I'm a bit quiet.  Lucky for me the house I stayed in was filled with the intellectuals of the Gay community, lawyers, librarians, Google tech guys,  guys that work in the healthcare industries, Political and Recruitment Media Strategists, etc.  Every single one of them was smart, good looking, full of integrity and kindness.  The housemates were very welcoming and I'm grateful for the experience.  I had such a good time that last year I returned to the same house to share the experience with a new group of great guys.

Experiencing the sunset on the pier

Fire Island doesn't only offer wild parties but it also offers some peaceful and beautiful moments.

Capturing Brian capturing the Fire Island sunset.  

It offers a space where friendships deepen.  A place where you can lay back and let the troubles of the world melt away.

And of course it offers pool parties where men meet, have thoughtful conversations, and even do a bit of skinny deeping.  Fire Island is a place where you can let loose.  

As a person who puts myself out to the public I've gotten emails from guys that struggle with their sexual orientation and who have even wondered if it is possible to grow old gay and happy.  Pay one visit to Fire Island and you'll see first hand how it's not only possible to grow old gay and happy but Fire Island is a necessary place on Earth.  Try to remember that when watching the new Logo TV show.

Friday, March 3, 2017

Newsletter February

Hi Dearest reader,

How are you?

Here is the latest news on our end:

In the month of February we tackled quite a few thought provoking topics on this blog:

1. Why do some people need Trigger Warnings before someone uses the word TRANNY?  
Read blog post click HERE

2. Do you know the benefits of having SEX?
Read blog post click HERE

3. Have you ever gone shopping in a department store's WOMEN'S section?
Read blog post click HERE

4. How is life living between the Masculine and Feminine realm?
Read blog post click HERE

5. What does it feel like to live in TRUMP COUNTRY when you're "different"?
Read blog click HERE

Sophia looking super sensual in her lingerie 

In February we did 5 Male-to-Female makeovers.  Since some of our girls are in the closet, understandably so, I can't share all their pics.  Here are two of my new favorite gals. 

Me and the delightfuly sassy and classy Vikki 
at the end of her first makeover/photoshoot session

For more info on male-to-female makeovers 
click HERE

click HERE

NEW video clips.  
To watch click HERE, HERE, and HERE 

The Facebook Gender Fun community SPEAKS!
Learn what the community is talking about.
Request your FREE Questions Directory (as seen in above screenshot) 
Email us at

Request your FREE over 9000 word Travel Log
of our 17 day 2016 Crossdressing Cross Country Trip
Email us at

To read all newsletters click HERE

Thank you so much for your ongoing support.

Adrian L Acosta

Amnesia Sparkles

The latest Gender Fun: